Should you happen to wander onto social media on this International Women's Day, you're likely to see a familiar quote repeated in caption after caption: "Here's to strong women. May we know them, may we raise them. May we be them."
And as fond as we are of this passage, which Michelle Obama once penned to Lily Collins after the release of the actress' 2017 memoir, it'd be nice if it came with a few instructions. Because there's no one-size-fits-all guidebook to bringing up well-adjusted, passionate, intelligent, strong AF women, just the overwhelming feeling that you don't want to eff it up.
Even the past FLOTUS herself admits to feeling moments of uncertainty when it came to raising Malia, 24, and Sasha, 21, with husband Barack Obama.
"As a parent, you are always fighting your own desperation not to fail at the job you've been given," she wrote in her 2022 book, The Light We Carry. "There are whole industries built to feed and capitalize on this very desperation, from baby brain gyms and ergonomic strollers to SAT coaches. It's like a hole that can't ever be filled."
Though if she were to attempt to stop up the figurative gaps, she'd do so with the so-called "little pearls of wisdom" she gleaned from her own mother, Marian Robinson, who moved along with them to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.
Chief among the lessons that Michelle absorbed: The importance of allowing kids to make their own mistakes.
"My mom believed that her hands only got in the way of our hands. If there was something new we needed to learn, she'd show us a way to do it and then quickly step aside," she explained. "This, I believe, was my first taste of power. I liked being trusted to get something done."
Now done with the task of raising her girls (as much as any parent is ever done with that particular job), she's just one of many celebrities who have opened up about the lessons they've tried to pass on.
To celebrate International Women's Day March 8, we asked a few others to share the lessons they've worked the hardest to impart in hopes of providing that proverbial village we all need to raise our children. Here's to their advice. May we know it, may we use it. May we embody it.
Living an existence that's unapologetically them? It's handled for the Little Fires Everywhere actress's three kids: Isabelle, 8, Caleb, 6, and a 17-year-old daughter from husband Nnamdi Asomugha's previous relationship. Asked the top lesson she hopes to pass on to her daughters, the star told E! News' Francesca Amiker at the NAACP Image Awards, "I want my girls to just be unapologetically who they are. You know? To just feel like they can be who they are in the truth of all that they are."
Hey now, hey now, raising strong AF daughters is what the actress' dreams are made of. "I just want them to know their power and to know that they things that we can handle are incredible," the How I Met Your Father star told E! News of Banks, 4, and Mae, 23 months, her girls with husband Matthew Koma. (She's also mom to 10-year-old son Luca with ex Mike Comrie.) "I'm trying to set up a great area for them to thrive and grow, but I just fully want them to be who they want to be and who they're meant to be. No apologies."
She has Hope, 3, she has Haley Joy, 6, now all the Today Show anchor wants is for her girls to find their bliss. "I just want them to be happy," the Making Space With Hoda Kotb host told E! News' Amiker. "I don't want anything else."
And while she noted those who crave money will always seek out that next high-paying gig, people who need romantic relationships will always worry that love can be taken away. "I just want my kids to know that everything good comes from inside," she explained. "They will be their happiest if they realize that it's all inside there."
Dare we say the Oscar nominee did the thing when asked to share her top parenting lesson? "Your voice matters," the mom to 17-year-old twins Bronwyn and Slater (with husband Courtney B. Vance) told E! News at the NAACP Image Awards. "So speak out. Speak up, and speak out."
With a front-row seat to her mom's cunning advice, we're going to assume 28-year-old Ivy-Victoria has an entire notebook's worth of wisdom. But the Abbott Elementary star hopes this piece stands out. "It takes a very special man to breathe the air that she breathes," she recounted to E! News at the NAACP Image Awards. "Know your worth my child, don't just settle for just anything, but meet someone of equal yoke. So that you can carry on with the legacy of excellence that our ancestors want for us."
Never discount the power of the lessons you learned in kindergarten. When it comes to bringing up 9-year-old twins Gaia and John, the Once Upon a Time alum is "a big believer on this one quote: 'Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,'" she shared with E! News at the VIP opening of the LA Art Show. "And I know that it's really old school, but that's something that I really want them to really internalize."
The OG phrase works in tandem with the other message she delivers "every single morning," she said, "that what the world thinks of you is none of your business. It's what you think of yourself that matters."
We're predicting a lot of bedtime readings of Good Night, Sister in her girls' future. Because the author turned the message she hopes to impress upon daughters Lyla, 2, and Eloise, 9 months (with husband Chris Pratt), into a children's book that celebrates "sisterhood and the bond we have with our siblings, friends and parents from an early age," she told E! News. "I grew up being told there is nothing more important than family and I was shown that by my parents. My mom [Maria Shriver] is incredibly close to her brothers and my extended family is very close and shows up for each other always."
Raised in a tight-knit family that includes brothers Christopher and Patrick Schwarzenegger and 19 months younger sister Christina Schwarzenegger, she was shown "no matter what you go through in life, your family will have your back," continued the 33-year-old, which "is why I am so passionate about spreading the message of sisterhood and family to children, especially my own."
Count on the Teen Mom alum's dad Randy to come through with the sage wisdom. "For my daughters, I hope I pass on the lesson to always take the high road," the mom to Aubree, 13, Watson, 6, Layne, 4, and Walker, 2, shared with E! News. "It was something my dad always told me when I was growing up. There would be times I wanted to stoop down to someone's level or react to certain things, but he always would just tell me to take the high road."
The Down Home Fab star—wed to fellow HGTV host Cole DeBoer—credits the advice with helping her build her dream life. "I truly attribute a lot of where I've ended up in life to that lesson that I learned from him," she explained. "It always pays off to be a good person and karma is very real. Be a good person and focus on the positive."
A teaching we'll raise an opaque wine glass to: "The biggest lesson I hope to pass on to Brooklyn is confidence," the Love Is Blind host told E! News of her 8-year-old daughter. "Her knowing at a young age how incredible she is."
Once she's mastered that self-assuredness, continued the NCIS: Hawaii actress, also mom to sons Camden, 10, and Phoenix, 6, with husband Nick Lachey, "she can spend more time in her life following her dreams, making impactful mindful decisions and living her best happy life...however she defines that."